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13 March 2011 @ 05:41 pm
My husband found the bloodied, gory remains of his parakeet on the coffee table today. It had clearly been "played with" by our three small dogs.

However, the dogs could not have reached the cage themselves, so there must have been an accomplice.

We have a pet rat loose in the house. She could have entered the cage, killed the bird for its food and disposed of the body on the floor, within easy reach of the perilous pooches.

However, rats tend to defecate when they are nervous or angry, and there were no fecal remains in the bird cage.

On the other hand, parakeets, not unlike rats, are very intelligent — he may have freed himself from his cage, which upon inspection was surprisingly easy to do, and was used as a chew toy by the canine conspirators.

But one thing is for sure: This murder has ... *puts on sunglasses* ... gone to the dogs.

Current Mood: thoughtfulthoughtful
Current Music: The Who - Don't Get Fooled Again
18 February 2011 @ 12:54 am
OMFG people are fucking idiots.

We get calls like this all the time, and because I'm a goddamned professional I have to keep my cool and not stroke out on a bitch. But I have to fucking vent. This old douche with no life calls the newsroom today, and I pick up the phone...

Fucktard: Your coverage of the levels of chromium-6 in the water is atrocious. You are running it into the ground, and it's not even a big deal. You publish story after story after story—

Me: Would you like to speak to our managing editor?

Fucktard: No, I'm speaking to you. Chromium-6 isn't even a pollutant, it's a natural occurance. I take Chromium-3 for my diabetes. You publish story after story, blowing this whole thing out of proportion—

Me: Sir, you realize our managing editor controls what stories are written and what goes in the paper—

Fucktard: I DON'T GIVE A DAMN! (He straight-up yelled into the phone. I almost snapped right there. I should have snapped right there.) I hate this newspaper, my wife buys it once in a while but I can't stand it. Blah Blah Blah, words words words (I pretty much stopped paying attention after the yelling).

At the end of the convo, he told me, and I shit you not, "It was nice talking to you." I had to catch the "FUCK YOU, ASSHOLE" by the balls before it exited my mouth.

The ensuing rage:
First off, you sad motherfucker, don't raise you fucking voice to me. I don't even want to listen to you speak, let alone with a side of rudeness.

If you hate this newspaper so much, why the hell do you claim our coverage is bad? Clearly you're reading it. Or you're talking out of your ass.

Chromium-6 isn't a pollutant? You're fucking retard. And I hope you get hit by an ice cream truck. With cancer. Bitch.
17 February 2011 @ 02:05 am
I've been avoiding the Internet for the most part for the last couple of days. Work is going great. My new hours have been easy to adjust to since I have to get up early to take the kid to school.

I FINALLY saw The Hangover. I'm pretty sure my husband and I were the only two people left on Earth who hadn't seen it. I'm still the only one who hasn't seen Avatar. Missed it twice in the theater. Fuckery, I tell you!

I'm so just not feeling it tonight. I think I'm gonna go have some sex, toss back a few and curl up with a good book.

Hey, did you know Ed Helms really is missing a tooth? I lost a bet with the DH over that one, hence the sex.
Current Mood: calmcalm
Current Music: Zach Galifianakis - We're the Three Best Friends That Anyone Can Have
15 February 2011 @ 12:20 am
I finally watched Paranormal Activity 2 tonight. I watched it alone in my house with all the lights out to get the best effect. At the beginning, when Katie showed up, an actual chill went down my spine.

It was going great until I began to realize the demon was actually after the baby. Then I started to get pissed at said demon, which erased any fear the built-up suspense had created. I found myself feeling the swell of protectivness afforded me by nature after my daughter was born. Instead of cowering on the couch behind my pillow, I was sitting straight up, looking at the TV like, "Bitch, I will kick some DEMON ASS before you touch MY baby."

After that, the suspense was there, but I just wasn't feeling it. The bit in the basement at the end was some great stuff. The first-person-only POV with the night vision needs to be done a LOT. It was great. The ending and the way they tied it into the first one was kind of cool.

I had a delayed reaction to the original Paranormal Activity. Only after I had gone to bed and had time to really think about it did it start to frighten me. So we'll see how I sleep tonight before I give final thoughts on it.

Best reply I got this evening:

Me: This movie is pissing me the fuck off. The demon stalking the baby makes me angry with it, which makes me not the least bit scared of it.
RyanGhostbusters 2?


I start my new hours tomorrow! I'm so excited! The only problem is I took a long nap today and then watched a horror movie that has the potential to keep me up all night.

OHAI Nyquil!
Current Mood: awake
Current Music: Ghostbusters theme
I just started The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. I'm not very far in (just started chapter 3), but I can already tell it's going to be good. Each chapter begins with the introduction of an entirely new character. The chapter delves deep into the character's life. Even after only two chapters, it's been a lot of information to take in but I find myself not feeling at all confused. So far the hardest section to keep straight in Larsson's novel is this chunk of story with lots of economic jargon in it. But in the end, even that section comes across clearly.

Instead of the story feeling murky and hard to keep straight, it all begins to weave together beautifully. Again — and I can't stress this enough — I've only read TWO chapters (well, three if you include the prologue), and already I can tell this is a really, really well-written narrative. It was translated from Swedish, but the translation is almost pristine, with a few grammatical errors here and there that only someone in my profession (editor) would likely notice.
Current Mood: contentcontent
Current Music: The Dead Milkmen - Punk Rock Girl
14 February 2011 @ 01:19 am
The Grammys were on tonight. I didn't watch — because I know better — but I could tell from the outrage on my Twitter feed that nothing about this redheaded stepchild of award shows had changed in the past 10 to 15 years.

You know, I've seen the Oscars routinely award great films. I've seen the Emmys routinely award great television. And yet, somehow, the Grammys manage to fuck it up EVERY year.

One exception: Nine Inch Nails won Best Metal Performance for "Wish," which is probably still the only Grammy-winning song with the words "fist fuck" in it.

I've got news for you, Grammy winners are STILL chosen by old white men who only nominate people like Justin Bieber because that will get people to WATCH.

Case in point: Radiohead's A-FUCKING-MAY-ZING album OK Computer lost to Bob Dylan because the Grammys realized they were morons for not giving Dylan one 20 years ago.

Speaking of which...

Justin Bieber fans, chin up. Do you know how many Grammys the Rolling Stones have won? ZERO — save for a bullshit "lifetime achievement" award in 1989 (see above).

And finally, to those tweeting hatefulness about Justin Bieber: I remember when i was a kid in the early '90s, i liked New Kids on the Block, Vanilla Ice and MC Hammer. People hated on them, too. They hated on them, just as they hate on Justin, because they're jealous the things THEY like aren't getting that kind of attention.

It boggles my mind sometimes because all of us — my fellow Twilight fans especially — know what it's like to be a fan of something that eventually becomes overexposed and unpopular. But no one seems to make the connection.


Yesterday was hellishly busy. I was one of two people at work slated to do the whole Sunday paper. I got to work at 12:15 p.m. and left at 12:45 a.m. I pretty much got home and crashed the fuck out.

However, I've just started my new work schedule — 9:30 a.m. to 5:30 p.m. with Sundays and Mondays off. I'm thrilled. I live for the copy desk, but I thought I'd have to spend  a decade or more working my way into a managing editor's office because I could have daytime hours. It's like a dream-come-true.

Well, I volunteered to take the kid to school in the morning (nothing should happen before 8 a.m. — least of all learning) so I'd better hit the sack. Until next time...
Current Mood: optimisticoptimistic
Current Music: Radiohead - Paranoid Android
12 February 2011 @ 03:36 am
This is the best thing I've seen all week: 

Bored? Check out Greg Rutter's list of everything from the Internet anyone has ever talked about ever:

Greg Rutter's Definitive List of The 99 Things You Should Have Already Experienced On The Internet Unless You're a Loser or Old or Something

Greg Rutter's SECOND Definitive List of The 99 Things You Should Have Already Experienced On The Internet Unless You're A Loser or Old or Something
Current Mood: sleepysleepy
Current Music: The Bangles - Walk Like An Egyptian
10 February 2011 @ 11:48 pm
OK. This is gonna see weird, but I think THIS is the sexiest photo of Chaske Spencer I've seen lately:

Why, you ask? Because it epitomizes his appeal to me. You see, I love me some bad boys. But, as you ladies who share my favorite flavor can testify, dating bad boys comes at a price. These guys are unreliable, high maintenance, sometimes mean or even violent, and needy as all fuck.

Now, look at the photo again. Everyone in the photo is drinking except for him. We all know why (1, 2) and it's that sense of self-control that I find truly sexy. He's a recovering addict who's actually managed to get his shit together. Chaske has all the bad-boy appeal, but none of the drama.
Current Mood: touchedtouched
Current Music: Black Rebel Motorcycle Club - Spread Your Love
10 February 2011 @ 05:27 pm
As I understand it, a twitter user has been harassing some of our members, spewing the same kind of garbage about threats against Kristen.

One of our members has said this person is digging up personal information on the Internet, based on her previous inclusion of her last name in her Twitter information. This, unfortunately, is not illegal, nor is anything this person has done so far. Not to sound preachy or anything, but you must protect yourself online by limiting the amount of personal information you show to others, even your friends.

I am going to offer you all some advice: Stop giving a damn. Stop giving a damn what the sheep say and what they say to you. It IS possible. I have done it.

Do NOT engage them. Do NOT reply to their harassing tweets. Block them, if you wish, and move on. You do not have to lock your accounts if you don't give a damn what anyone has to say about you.

Let me share with you the difference between being a Nonsten on the board a year ago and being a Nonsten NOW.

A year ago:


Nonstens THEN: 



Nonstens NOW: 

Guys, we should be laughing at these people. Not fighting with them. Not arguing with them. Not spending our time here together being angry at them. They were harassing us back then, too. But we still managed to have a good time without it getting to us.

That is what made Nonsten fun. The laughs. Somewhere along the line, we lost sight of that. In my opinion, we need to fix this problem.

So for the love of Jacob, please stop talking to these people. IGNORE THEM. Go about your daily business and don't pay them the slightest bit of attention.

Do you know what these people do when they harass you? They sit there at their computers checking their @replies every 5 minutes, waiting for you to respond, waiting for you to validate them. If you ignore them, they WILL give up. And even if one of them doesn't, you still hold the power. Don't reply and don't talk about them or how their actions are affecting you. If you need to vent about someone harassing you, by all means do it in the sheep thread.

If any of you don't feel comfortable venting in front of everyone, talk to me. I'm here for you. If you need to talk:

• DM me on Twitter — this is by far the best way to get a hold of me quickly
• PM me on the board
• E-mail me:

Current Mood: determined
Current Music: Bon Jovi - Livin' on a Prayer
10 February 2011 @ 06:29 am
Marriage is a strange animal. You are, for each other, a system of checks and balances. When one of you is fucking up, it's the other's job to set you straight. It's easy being the setter-straighter: You know what's right. Things aren't so murky. But being the wrong one is a terrible feeling. You know what you're doing is false, and you have to hear about it from your significant other. But it is necessary. Most of the time, knowing what's right isn't enough. It isn't enough to motivate you. You have to hear it. OUT LOUD.

That's why marriage is still relevant — once in a while, you need someone to kick you in the ass and tell you to knock it off. Well, that's one of the reasons. I'm sure I'll get into the others in future posts.

I'm so glad I started doing this. It's so therapeutic. I feel so much more at peace after I'm done blogging. Even if my day has been a total strife-ridden mess.
Current Mood: aggravatedaggravated
Current Music: Puddle of Mudd - She fuckin' hates me